Getting Fit Will Get You Hot Chicks (no)

To conform or not to conform. That's not a question that many people would ask of themselves, though why would they?

A friend of mine was having issues getting laid. Well, the issue was more why his dates didn't go further than, "It's nice to meet you," as they scurried away from him like the Road Runner. Maybe he did this:

At that time, I remembered him calling me a racist when I made fun of Asians. I took that to mean that he was stiff, having no sense of humor, or maybe he was afraid of expressing himself. So I asked if he conformed to societal norms, or if he said whatever he wanted.

He made sure that he was the crazy one amongst his friends. That don't mean nuthin'.

Usually, I'm the crazy one when I hang out with people, but that's because most of them don't say or do stupid stuff like I do. But if I hung out with a bunch of adrenaline junkies, then I'd be the "normal" dude shivering in the back of the plane as everyone jumped out into uncertainty.

A few months later, my friend told me that he had had a string of women and was sure that it was due to him conforming. However, in hanging out with him, I found that he's conforming more to his true self, or that he expresses himself honestly, as Bruce Lee had put it.

I was discussing this subject of being more of yourself with an acquaintance of mine. He's socially awkward. He tends to stare at you for long periods of time. He thinks getting fit will get you hot chicks (it can help, but no). It's difficult for him to carry a conversation, so he usually sits there, staring at hot chicks.

"I tend to say whatever I want," I said. "So practice doing that. And don't worry about what other people think of you. You have no control over that."

So he thought for a moment as he stared at me and said, "I like to spank girls."


Now it may look like I'm pulling in the reigns of honestly expressing yourself, but I know what he was trying to do. He was trying to say stupid shit like I did. I say stupid shit because sometimes I like getting a rise out of people. I've had years of practice. He hadn't. So when he said he likes spanking girls, which is cool, me too, he was trying to emulate some part of me instead of being himself.

There are times when I talk to my friends and I'm very straight forward. No funny stuff. Boring really. Sometimes I like being lewd and crude and rude and using lube because the situation calls for it. Or maybe I like it.

The whole point is do you. Whatever that may be. If you wanna be silly, then be silly. If you want to have a serious conversation, then have it. If you wanna jump out of a plane, then don't ask me to join. Seriously. That shit scares the shit out of me. I actually would empty my bowels as I plummet toward the earth.